The purpose of our “Expert Advice” posts is to discover the real truths to wedding planning. These aren’t meant to be fluffy, feel-good articles. Planning your Tampa Bay wedding can be daunting, exhausting, and stressful if you haven’t done your homework, and we don’t want to sugarcoat that reality. But luckily for you, Marry Me Tampa Bay is here to help you make educated decisions about your wedding.

We can’t tell you how many times I’ve read a wedding planning advice article only to have been told generic, non-helpful information. To really understand the ins and outs of wedding planning, reading the “butterflies and rainbows” article just won’t do.

If you’re looking for raw, honest wedding planning advice, then we hope you’ll be enlightened throughout this post. We’ve enlisted the help of our preferred wedding vendors, who are true experts in the Tampa Bay wedding industry, to share what they feel couples need to know to make educated decisions. Please read their thoughts with the understanding that they truly want to help you have the best wedding planning experience possible!

“One thing that drives me nuts is when a client leaves a voicemail or email and immediately texts to let me know they called or emailed and they would love a response. While I want to answer right away, we are at meetings or events, which makes us a little different than most businesses in that we are not always in front of the computer.” -Katy Martin, Coastal Coordinating

“Wedding vendors are not just working for you; they are working with dozens of other couples. Respecting their time during meetings, being punctual, and sticking to agreed-upon timelines makes it easier for everyone. The more organized and clear you are, the better the outcome,” -Ashley Johnson, B Eventful

“Goodnight! We exhausted! It has been such a joy to work with you for the last year to year and a half! We are so glad we have knocked your socks off with our talent, created an environment for your guests to have an amazing night, and created some core memories for you. We appreciate your gratitude, hugs, and kind words, but goodnight! We done! After being on our feet for 13 hours, answering every single question that arose, and breaking records with our steps, we just want to head home, take some Advil, shower, and sleep! We are physically and mentally on empty.” -Staci Mandikas, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“Communication is a crucial aspect of planning a wedding. I often find myself generating proposals and information requested by couples, only to be ghosted. This is frustrating, especially since couples can be demanding and often request quick turnaround times. I always strive to provide potential clients with everything they need to facilitate a meeting or phone call as quickly as possible. Despite sending follow-up emails and attempting to reach out by phone, I frequently don’t hear back. Sometimes, proposals are shopped around for lower prices at the couple’s discretion. However, the least I expect is a brief email thanking me for my time and explaining that they have chosen to go in a different direction. If something seemed unreasonable, feedback would be appreciated, allowing me the opportunity to suggest alternatives. Not being selected by a couple is part of the business, but ghosting someone is just poor etiquette.” -John Elice, Bruce Wayne Florals

“Having multiple points of contact is not fun or easy. We often see that there are so many more people involved in the wedding planning process than ever before: moms, mother-in-laws, or even best friends. Well, it’s great to have people to help you. It also makes the process very hard. It’s hard to get your wants and dreams crossed when there are so many people chiming in and questioning everything. It makes the wedding planning process much harder and much harder to complete tasks. We completely understand that you want people to help you. We have done this for many years, and if you trust us, just know that if it’s just us and only one other person (but mostly just us), we can work more effectively and faster for you. We see that there are more arguments, stress, and fights when more people are involved with the planning process. It makes it harder on you and more stressful as well. When a client is planning their wedding with just themselves and me, the process is much more efficient and seamless, and those couples are way less stressed as well.” -Katy Martin, Coastal Coordinating

“Your guests do not care that the napkins are folded in a specialty TikTok fold. They care if they’re standing in a 20-minute bar line with nowhere to sit and no clue what’s happening next.” —Staci Mandikas, Owner & Plansigner, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“Book an experienced planner and the right amount of planning services. In the nearly 10 years we’ve been shooting weddings, the most chaotic days are when a couple doesn’t book the proper wedding day/design/logistical support. A day-of coordinator is for sure better than you or your mother running around doing it all. However, having partial or full planning is going to result in a much less stressful and more cohesive day, as well as a more streamlined and informed planning process. Add to that typically better design decisions being made, which has a huge effect on the overall look and feel of your day. Working with a planning team that has had several years of experience is going to give you so much more insight and ease than someone who is just starting out. The wild thing is that since your photo team is with you all day, people assume we know every job on the wedding day. We may know some things here and there, but positioning and pairing up a 16-person wedding party in a matter of seconds is just not one of them. Make sure you’re thinking of these things when you’re convincing yourself that you don’t need this planning support!” -Shannon Dewitt, Dewitt for Love Photography

“Vendors genuinely want to make your dream wedding a reality, but there’s often a disconnect between what couples envision and what their budget allows. It’s not about vendors being ‘too expensive;’ it’s about the level of craftsmanship, materials, and time it takes to achieve those results. For example, if you dream of elaborate floral installations cascading from the ceiling, know that this involves hours of labor, specialty equipment, and a team of professionals to set up and tear down. Similarly, a luxury wedding photographer isn’t just taking pictures for eight hours. They’re also spending days editing, planning, and preparing to ensure every moment is beautifully preserved. The best way to manage this? Be upfront about your budget. Instead of saying, ‘I want luxury on a shoestring budget,’ say, ‘This is my total budget. What’s the best way to maximize it for our vision?’ Vendors can help you prioritize where to splurge and where to scale back. -Arron McNeile, McNeile Photography

“Pinterest and TikTok have convinced people that weddings magically assemble themselves overnight with a hot glue gun and positive thinking. Most of the weddings you’re saving involve production teams, freight elevators, labor crews, installation windows, power requirements, and budgets social media conveniently forgets to mention.” —Staci Mandikas, Owner & Plansigner, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“While it is a great way to save money, it is never a good idea to take the florals into your own hands. There are so many variables that can happen. What if the flowers don’t arrive on time or at all? What if the flowers are not great; how are you going to get backups for them? A florist has those contacts to get them right away. Will you have time to prep and process them the day before you put them together? Do you have the containers or products like ribbon to properly make them? Who will deliver them on the day of the wedding? Do you have a fridge large enough to keep them cold? There are so many what ifs in these options. I highly suggest spending the money and getting a professional for this.” -Katy Martin, Coastal Coordinating

“Open seating can be successful if done properly, but most of the time, it’s done very poorly and leaves the planner and the guests feeling awkward. Most of the time, couples do open seating, thinking it’s better for the guests because they can pick who they sit next to. However, it can cause a lot of stress to claim the seats you want and not have your group broken up. There are also guests who arrive who may not know your friends, and then they are left having to force interaction and find a table that will welcome them to sit down. It gives me middle school lunchroom vibes all over again! There are also a lot of weddings where guests don’t get along, and assigned seating guarantees that they won’t end up at the same table. If you do open seating, please have more tables and chairs than actual guests so people can spread out. When it’s an exact number, then people will definitely end up being split and across the room from one another. Please consider doing assigned seating. This reduces social anxiety among your guests because they know exactly where they are going and where they belong. You also can control who they are by and keep them from guests they don’t like or match them with personalities that suit theirs, even if they don’t know one another!” -Delaney Driver, Wilder Mind Events

“We don’t like to see so many activities planned, like when a client tells us they want to party all night long, but they want to do an anniversary dance, shoe game, karaoke, faux exit, pictures with families during dancing, and whatever else they have planned besides dancing. Keep it to a max of about two extra activities if you feel like you need to add those, but really all you need is some good booty shakin’ to ensure your guests have a great time.” -Christopher Grainger, Graingertainment

“You do not need 47 scheduled activities at your wedding reception. People genuinely enjoy eating, drinking, dancing, and talking to each other. Every wedding does not need a shoe game, bouquet toss, private last dance, surprise performance, fake exit, outfit change, and karaoke grand finale. K.I.S.S. (Keep It Super Simple)” —Staci Mandikas, Owner & Plansigner, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“A wedding can be absolutely gorgeous and still feel awkward in real life. I’ve seen beautiful rooms with terrible flow, dead dance floors because the layout killed the energy, and timelines so packed that guests looked stressed trying to keep up.” —Staci Mandikas, Owner & Plansigner, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“The garter and bouquet toss is something we are seeing less and less because it calls out the girls who are single, and maybe they don’t really want to be called out. For the guys, let’s be honest, you have to drag them out to even be part of it. Also, the person who caught the garter putting it on the person who caught the bouquet; if it isn’t strategic or one of them is not age-appropriate, it’s just so awkward! We are also seeing a lot of couples who don’t care to do a cake cutting or just do it without announcing it, which I like because it doesn’t break the flow of the evening and can be done whenever needed so they can get that cake cut.”-Carrie Wildes, Carrie Wildes Photography

“Your friends & family don’t want to be responsible for taking care of your dog on your wedding day. I know it may not seem like a big deal, but no matter how well behaved your dog is it is still a huge obligation. Consider that this person will likely need to transport your dog to and from the venue; they will need to pick up after them & continue to ensure their needs are met throughout the day. Beyond that, you want your guests to be able to remain completely present on your wedding day! They will likely miss out on parts of your day if they are tasked with caring for your dog. This is especially important if your dog will be a part of the ceremony. If you truly want your dog to be a part of your wedding, there are wedding pet care professionals that are specifically there to make it a seamless experience!” —Kelly Nova, Co-Founder, FairyTail Pet Care

“Your vendors are usually not trying to ruin your vision when we push back on something. We’re trying to stop you from accidentally creating a logistical nightmare because we’ve already watched that exact situation implode at three other weddings, over the course of two decades.” —Staci Mandikas, Owner & Plansigner, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“One thing your wedding florist wishes you knew? The 30-day mark is not the time for major changes. By then, final payments have been made, floral orders have been placed, rentals are packed and prepped, and timelines are already in motion behind the scenes. During those final weeks, our team ties up loose ends, confirms logistics, and carefully prepares every detail to ensure your wedding day runs seamlessly. Last-minute additions or cuts may seem small, but can create unnecessary stress for both the couple and the vendors, leaving more room for errors in an already fast-moving countdown. We always want the planning process to feel exciting and seamless, so our best advice is simple: lock in your final decisions before the 30-day countdown begins!” —Ava Young, Logistics & Weddings Coordinator, Beneva

“Don’t count on the photo/video team to make your wedding look like it didn’t. Okay, so hear me out on this one. Many times photo and video might be a large part of the budget, and I think that’s amazing that a couple wants to invest in an amazing team to capture it all. However, a trend I’ve noticed over the years is putting all of the weight of what your wedding looks like on your photographer. Skimping on hiring a planner, skimping on the overall design or florals, and then leaning heavily on the visuals that the photographer provides to ‘fix’ the other areas of the day that are lacking. Remember that we are still capturing your day as it actually looked. While we shoot to capture it all in an elevated way, your photo and video team are just one part of your overall team including your venue/planner/florist/rentals that influence the way your day ultimately looks. Make sure you’re not leaning too heavily on one vendor to pick up the slack, but rather having a more equal budget to spread around! (Extra tip: If you don’t loooove your venue, make sure you are allowing your photographer to carve out extra time after the First Look to take you to a more picturesque area nearby for your photos together/with your wedding party. This actually is a great way to elevate the look of your day if you’re not in love with the aesthetics of your venue!)” —Shannon Dewitt, Dewitt for Love Photography

“When we hear a bad idea, we will never insult you by saying it’s a bad idea. Phrases like It’s not my favorite or That’s one way to go are our way of responding to it and being polite. Let us think on it, maybe there’s a way to retain the roots of your idea, but add in our experience and expertise.” —Staci Mandikas, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“We know that planning a wedding can be stressful and you want to get reassurance from your vendors, sometimes in person. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to meet up with them face to face, but make sure you email or call to set up that in-person meeting. Vendors have very busy schedules and sometimes limit meetings to specific days so that they can take care of their other responsibilities. When you drop in to chat really quick, you could be throwing off a vendor’s entire day and possibly affect someone else’s event. They usually won’t tell you they can’t meet if you’ve already shown up in-person, but know they’re secretly rearranging their entire day in their heads. If the matter isn’t urgent, email first and try to be patient with them. If the matter is urgent, try to call before showing up since phone calls are usually faster and just as much can get done.” —Melanie Eubanks, Lemon Drops Weddings and Events

“We hate having to tell clients we can’t do their wedding because they waited too long to book us. If you know you want a vendor and have had your eye on them, book them as soon as possible. Nothing is worse than having to turn down our ideal clients!” —Delaney Driver, Wilder Mind Events

“As much as we want to turn it off, we are ALWAYS thinking about your wedding. I know that some clients feel like if we aren’t meeting, talking, or emailing, then we aren’t working, but I assure you, we are. We have to make progress on the planning of every wedding, every week, to stay on schedule. Even though we aren’t face-to-face, there is ALWAYS work being done!” —Staci Mandikas, UNIQUE Weddings + Events

“There is no such thing as a Day-of Coordinator. You cannot just show up the day of and expect anybody to know what to do and make judgment calls on your behalf. The correct term is ‘Month of’ Coordinator. We need a month of getting your details in order and getting to know your vision in order to be able to carry it out the way you envisioned it in your head.” —Tammy Waterman, Special Moments Event Planning

“We cringe when the couple gives us a long playlist of ‘must plays’ that no one knows, then expect us to rock their party. Clients must understand that sometimes you can’t have a picky playlist and also a rocking dance floor.” —Christopher Grainger, Graingertainment